I've noticed that i've been thinking big on alot of my goals recently. I think too far into the future, it seems. I get the plan, I understand how to do it.. But I end up never starting it. So I guess im going to try and take things as they come now.
Get out of here.The rest comes later.
Sigh, here comes the leap of faith.
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
20 Questions pertaining to life.
1. Why is there poverty and suffering in the world?
Because few reign over many, through greed and this never-ending pursuit to further oneself in the short years we have.
2. What is the relationship between science and religion?
Religion is an extreme philosophy. A belief pertaining to the why. I guess I'd say science is the same, but doesn't persecute, or give up by saying "It simply is."
3. Why are so many people depressed?
Finding no meaning in life. Monuments to greed and flash are projected into everyday life, which people see and think: I want that. They either don't work hard enough, or give up too early.
4. What are we all so afraid of?
I think a majority of people are scared of what comes after death
5. When is war justifiable?
Never. Defense is justifiable, but any actions against another people for gain is not
6. How would God want us to respond to aggression and terrorism?
By not being so singular in our views. We see them as these horrible barbarians, as some sort of animal. Each country has a history, and each country has a reason to do what they do. These terrorists are a movement that have a militant background.
7. How does one obtain true peace?
Within themselves.
8. What does it mean to live in the present moment?
I guess I'd say it means to lost ambition, to fill oneself with simple pleasure. Taking what you get out of life and not letting it bother you, I guess.
9. What is our greatest distraction?
The Media.
10. Is current religion serving its purpose?
No.
11. What happens to you after you die?
I either become nutrition for the circle of life, or I keep this voice inside my head and leave my body to go to some sort of enlightened state.
12. Describe heaven and how to get there.
I see heaven as earth without boundaries set by birth, religion, class, or monetary value. Where the black and white hold hands and hug one another, where homosexual/bisexual look to heterosexuals with respect, not fear. Where each of us can fulfill a personalized destiny, so to speak.
13. What is the meaning of life?
To simply live, and be at peace with oneself and their surroundings.
14. Describe God.
God...... is not some sort of lightning-bolt throwing, wrath-inducing, angry human. If you controlled the entirety of existence, would you really care if a person had sex before marriage? If one of your creations fell in deep love and pursued a relationship with someone of the same sex? We're not that important. We are an atom in the wind that is this universe.
15. What is the greatest quality humans possess?
Hope and Inspiration.
16. What is it that prevents people from living to their full potential?
Not enough hard work, conformity, giving up on their dreams. DON'T EVER LET SOMEONE TELL YOU CHILDHOOD DREAMS ARE UNACHIEVABLE BECAUSE THEY NEVER FULFILLED THEIRS.
17. Noverbally, by motion or gesture only, act out what you believe to be the current condition of the world.
(5 minute interpretive dance of a master using puppet strings, and the poor of the world dancing around, desperately trying to cut the strings that tie them to the masters' will.)
18. What is your one wish for the world?
If I could live out one dream in my life, it is to at least help one person on this earth know that all we have to depend on is hope, and inspiration. We can get through. We can win. We can succeed. No matter what you put your mind to, you can achieve it. The human mind is a beautiful thing, although to make change it often takes a different path of mind, a different way to see something. Please take a moment to stand back, outside of yourself as in the third person to look at your surroundings, to look within yourself and ask "Is this the way I want to live? Would I be happy If I was here in 5 years? 10 years?" If not, make some changes. Don't be afraid. Please, please, please do not be afraid. Change is hard, but it is necessary. If you don't make changes to alter your life for your vision of where you would like it to be, you will always only day-dream about it, or think about it like some sort of luggage or parasite that eats away at you. Move and shift with your environment to better your life.
19. What is wisdom and how do we gain it?
Wisdom is simply education without boundaries. The why, and what. Not the this is that because of this and that. We have gone many, many, many years as a race without formal education, and yes formal education helps immensely, but when it comes to answers and questions about LIFE, not specialized information drilled into every 5-18 year old' head like some assembly line to grow up and pay taxes and work at this job to help the "society." Wisdom simply is.
20. Are we all one?
Absolutely, positively yes. I Do not care where you come from, I do not care where you're going. I am your brother, I am your fellow man. We have the same blood flowing through our veins, we have the same lungs, heart, liver, stomach, hands, feet, fingers, toes. We are human. Give me a generation of babies born without prejudice drilled into themselves and I will give a reason for life. Them. That we are not doomed as a species. We are all animals, except we hate one another. The human beings capacity for hate is appalling. Why do you really care if someone of color crosses the imaginary lines on this beautiful earth into your 'country'? Does it really hurt you personally if two people of the same sex marry? Are pot-smoking teenagers going to ruin this society? Give your fellow man a break. They're living just like you. They want to get married, have kids, go to college, see the world. They do not have some evil plot in mind to flip the world upside down. I'm sure I can label every single person on this planet, and find some way to twist their goal in life to make it seem evil to the 'majority'. Let people live. Let people live in peace. Love is what we have. Hug and Kiss and rejoice with your community, regardless who's in it and where they came from.
Peace and Love
-David Lindsey
Because few reign over many, through greed and this never-ending pursuit to further oneself in the short years we have.
2. What is the relationship between science and religion?
Religion is an extreme philosophy. A belief pertaining to the why. I guess I'd say science is the same, but doesn't persecute, or give up by saying "It simply is."
3. Why are so many people depressed?
Finding no meaning in life. Monuments to greed and flash are projected into everyday life, which people see and think: I want that. They either don't work hard enough, or give up too early.
4. What are we all so afraid of?
I think a majority of people are scared of what comes after death
5. When is war justifiable?
Never. Defense is justifiable, but any actions against another people for gain is not
6. How would God want us to respond to aggression and terrorism?
By not being so singular in our views. We see them as these horrible barbarians, as some sort of animal. Each country has a history, and each country has a reason to do what they do. These terrorists are a movement that have a militant background.
7. How does one obtain true peace?
Within themselves.
8. What does it mean to live in the present moment?
I guess I'd say it means to lost ambition, to fill oneself with simple pleasure. Taking what you get out of life and not letting it bother you, I guess.
9. What is our greatest distraction?
The Media.
10. Is current religion serving its purpose?
No.
11. What happens to you after you die?
I either become nutrition for the circle of life, or I keep this voice inside my head and leave my body to go to some sort of enlightened state.
12. Describe heaven and how to get there.
I see heaven as earth without boundaries set by birth, religion, class, or monetary value. Where the black and white hold hands and hug one another, where homosexual/bisexual look to heterosexuals with respect, not fear. Where each of us can fulfill a personalized destiny, so to speak.
13. What is the meaning of life?
To simply live, and be at peace with oneself and their surroundings.
14. Describe God.
God...... is not some sort of lightning-bolt throwing, wrath-inducing, angry human. If you controlled the entirety of existence, would you really care if a person had sex before marriage? If one of your creations fell in deep love and pursued a relationship with someone of the same sex? We're not that important. We are an atom in the wind that is this universe.
15. What is the greatest quality humans possess?
Hope and Inspiration.
16. What is it that prevents people from living to their full potential?
Not enough hard work, conformity, giving up on their dreams. DON'T EVER LET SOMEONE TELL YOU CHILDHOOD DREAMS ARE UNACHIEVABLE BECAUSE THEY NEVER FULFILLED THEIRS.
17. Noverbally, by motion or gesture only, act out what you believe to be the current condition of the world.
(5 minute interpretive dance of a master using puppet strings, and the poor of the world dancing around, desperately trying to cut the strings that tie them to the masters' will.)
18. What is your one wish for the world?
If I could live out one dream in my life, it is to at least help one person on this earth know that all we have to depend on is hope, and inspiration. We can get through. We can win. We can succeed. No matter what you put your mind to, you can achieve it. The human mind is a beautiful thing, although to make change it often takes a different path of mind, a different way to see something. Please take a moment to stand back, outside of yourself as in the third person to look at your surroundings, to look within yourself and ask "Is this the way I want to live? Would I be happy If I was here in 5 years? 10 years?" If not, make some changes. Don't be afraid. Please, please, please do not be afraid. Change is hard, but it is necessary. If you don't make changes to alter your life for your vision of where you would like it to be, you will always only day-dream about it, or think about it like some sort of luggage or parasite that eats away at you. Move and shift with your environment to better your life.
19. What is wisdom and how do we gain it?
Wisdom is simply education without boundaries. The why, and what. Not the this is that because of this and that. We have gone many, many, many years as a race without formal education, and yes formal education helps immensely, but when it comes to answers and questions about LIFE, not specialized information drilled into every 5-18 year old' head like some assembly line to grow up and pay taxes and work at this job to help the "society." Wisdom simply is.
20. Are we all one?
Absolutely, positively yes. I Do not care where you come from, I do not care where you're going. I am your brother, I am your fellow man. We have the same blood flowing through our veins, we have the same lungs, heart, liver, stomach, hands, feet, fingers, toes. We are human. Give me a generation of babies born without prejudice drilled into themselves and I will give a reason for life. Them. That we are not doomed as a species. We are all animals, except we hate one another. The human beings capacity for hate is appalling. Why do you really care if someone of color crosses the imaginary lines on this beautiful earth into your 'country'? Does it really hurt you personally if two people of the same sex marry? Are pot-smoking teenagers going to ruin this society? Give your fellow man a break. They're living just like you. They want to get married, have kids, go to college, see the world. They do not have some evil plot in mind to flip the world upside down. I'm sure I can label every single person on this planet, and find some way to twist their goal in life to make it seem evil to the 'majority'. Let people live. Let people live in peace. Love is what we have. Hug and Kiss and rejoice with your community, regardless who's in it and where they came from.
Peace and Love
-David Lindsey
Saturday, August 1, 2009
The end of summer draws near
This has been by far the best summer of my life. There have been unbelieveable high notes, and a few devastating bad decisions.
I've never felt so alive.
I've had the time of my life, i've been sick as a dog, i've done almost everything on my list of 100, i've seen my parents, and i've said my goodbyes. I'm as ready as i'll ever be when it comes to growing up so i'm just ready to go.
I should've been gone more than a month ago, but like in everyone else's lives, we make decisions that we couldn't have forseen making such a difference even a month in the future. /shrug. It was worth it.
Times are a-changin' and I guess it's my time to flow with river of life and let go of this rock called childhood i've been holding onto.
Oh, but before I go, i'd like to make a few notes on the novel i've just finished reading which I enjoyed immensely. The Grapes of Wrath. At first I was a bit hesitant as to whether or not I should read it, but I had a long bus ride so I made the most of it. It was pretty amazing. It really touched me, I saw how the characters represented the human spirit, at least to me. They simply lived, looking for the best way for them to survive. A few of them talked about "a-studyin'" as if it were some unheard of thing. I thought it particularly endearing the way we tend to take advantage of one another, as human beings. The representative of the bank came to each family to tell them they had to leave the land. The land that they lived on, the land that their fathers and their fathers' father had lived on. The representative talked of the bank as if it were some monster. He wasn't anything, he wasn't even a part of it. He says: If he could let them stay there, he would. And the local who plowed their land with a tractor, how he was just thinking of his family and himself. (Usually a very noble cause, until you're harming your own community to feed your family.) I loved how Steinbeck illustrates the entire era. Be it a waitress working in a restraunt on Route 66, or the Okies migrating to the 'Golden' state. For me, this book really went to heart. The fallacy of man it seems to me. It's quite beautiful. Well I wasn't able to touch all points on the topic, but I've got to run.
Peace and Love.
-David Lindsey
I've never felt so alive.
I've had the time of my life, i've been sick as a dog, i've done almost everything on my list of 100, i've seen my parents, and i've said my goodbyes. I'm as ready as i'll ever be when it comes to growing up so i'm just ready to go.
I should've been gone more than a month ago, but like in everyone else's lives, we make decisions that we couldn't have forseen making such a difference even a month in the future. /shrug. It was worth it.
Times are a-changin' and I guess it's my time to flow with river of life and let go of this rock called childhood i've been holding onto.
Oh, but before I go, i'd like to make a few notes on the novel i've just finished reading which I enjoyed immensely. The Grapes of Wrath. At first I was a bit hesitant as to whether or not I should read it, but I had a long bus ride so I made the most of it. It was pretty amazing. It really touched me, I saw how the characters represented the human spirit, at least to me. They simply lived, looking for the best way for them to survive. A few of them talked about "a-studyin'" as if it were some unheard of thing. I thought it particularly endearing the way we tend to take advantage of one another, as human beings. The representative of the bank came to each family to tell them they had to leave the land. The land that they lived on, the land that their fathers and their fathers' father had lived on. The representative talked of the bank as if it were some monster. He wasn't anything, he wasn't even a part of it. He says: If he could let them stay there, he would. And the local who plowed their land with a tractor, how he was just thinking of his family and himself. (Usually a very noble cause, until you're harming your own community to feed your family.) I loved how Steinbeck illustrates the entire era. Be it a waitress working in a restraunt on Route 66, or the Okies migrating to the 'Golden' state. For me, this book really went to heart. The fallacy of man it seems to me. It's quite beautiful. Well I wasn't able to touch all points on the topic, but I've got to run.
Peace and Love.
-David Lindsey
Friday, July 17, 2009
Impending Adulthood
I went to the Air Force recruiter today, and here's what my future holds:
Sometime next week I turn in the paperwork, and the week after that I go to MEPS.
She told me that I should have a ship date within the next cycle, which is once a month. There is also a "Quick Ship" route where I go into the MEPS station every tuesday, and if for whatever reason someone who was supposed to ship out that day didn't show up or couldn't leave, I take their spot. So I'm looking at leaving within 3-6 weeks.
I'm kinda nervous about the Quick Ship, but I'm sure i'd be able to call my family before I got on the plane so that consoles me a bit. So I'm looking at..... In about 14 weeks from today I'll be done with boot camp, and going to technical school, then by about december I should know where I'm going to be stationed. Let's hope I go somewhere nice!
-David A. Lindsey
Sometime next week I turn in the paperwork, and the week after that I go to MEPS.
She told me that I should have a ship date within the next cycle, which is once a month. There is also a "Quick Ship" route where I go into the MEPS station every tuesday, and if for whatever reason someone who was supposed to ship out that day didn't show up or couldn't leave, I take their spot. So I'm looking at leaving within 3-6 weeks.
I'm kinda nervous about the Quick Ship, but I'm sure i'd be able to call my family before I got on the plane so that consoles me a bit. So I'm looking at..... In about 14 weeks from today I'll be done with boot camp, and going to technical school, then by about december I should know where I'm going to be stationed. Let's hope I go somewhere nice!
-David A. Lindsey
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Yes!!!!
As of today, my debt to society has been paid!!! I'm so happy and proud of myself, lol. I worked 64 1/2 hours this week!
So blistered feet, little sleep and 16 hour work days really paid off :).
My plans shall be set in motion as of tomorrow :)
So blistered feet, little sleep and 16 hour work days really paid off :).
My plans shall be set in motion as of tomorrow :)
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Vagrancy
Vagrancy Day One:
It's 10:00 at night right now. It's been 13 hours since waking up and making the influenced decision to move out of Audra & Matt's house. I'm at the Living Word Bible Church, or "Boob church" as the locals like to call it. My plan is to sleep here for the next week or two, until my parents come, which is hopefully soon. Since I'm able to do my community service here, I'm pretty sure it's a great idea to squat here. If i go to sleep when the church closes and I'll get enough sleep to wake up when they close again. I can then work from that time until it closes once again, and get a good 14-16 hour work day. They also feed me a sandwich sometime during the day, and I have three granola bars left, so food is taken care of. I have somewhere to sleep, spend my time, and my community service should be done by Sunday or so. I have a trash bag full of clothes and my possessions include a deodorant, shoes, some items of meaning which are A day of silence card, a picture taken at prom of Haley, Connor, Christine, and myself, a book of matches, a lighter and my ipod, and 2 dollars to my name. Possession wise I have little, if nothing. But somehow I'm okay with what I'm doing and the decision I've made. I'm preparing for the lifestyle that I will undoubtedly have. This is a random thought, but when I close my eyes all I can hear is life around me. The ceaseless chirp of crickets, the wind rustling the leaves of trees, and I can feel the brightness of the moon upon my face. When I close my eyes I see dots play across my eyelids as if in some crazy dance. I should get going. So long; David Allen Lindsey.
Vagrancy Day Two:I was stopped by the police today. When I woke up, I had gone over to a wall to sit on and smoke a cigarette. After I had finished it, a cop pulls up and flashes his lights. I hopped down and he said someone called in because they thought I was smoking pot. So we start this 10 minute tirade of him accusing me of smoking weed whilst going through my meager possessions. After his search was in vain, he asks me when I was doing out here, If i had a home to go to, etc. I tell him I do and that I had walked here to do community service which then gets him to go to his computer to look up my crime. I had lied about my age so he didn't write me a ticket for smoking underage, so he couldn't find any record of me in the system, and after awhile of him asking my birthday over and over again, and talking shit about how I look like I slept outside and whatnot, I just asked if I could be on my way, since I wasn't smoking pot and that's what he came there for anyway. He sighed and told me to stop smoking and sped away in his cruiser. So I guess that was the scary event of today, and it's made me decide to sleep in a park today, so the church doesn't find out about me living on their property. My feet are hurting immensely right now because I didn't have socks and blood blisters had formed in every part of my shoe where skin touches crease and nook. I worked 16 hours today; I've cleaned bathrooms, vacuumed, swept, picked up numerous pieces of trash all while hearing people talk about their prejudiced beliefs. Instead of a sandwich, they fed me some pasta today which was pretty filling and I was grateful for it. Meh, I dunno... I like this lifestyle, I'm as independent as I've always wanted to be (Don't get me wrong though, my parents have always been very lenient.), but not being able to shower is really taking its toll. I REALLY want a shower right now. I got a lot of slivers in my back and arms when I slept last night from the wood floor. Sigh, I'm okay I just need more sleep and less work hours haha. Ive gotta go and try to sleep. Goodnight.
Vagrancy Day Three:
I went home today to get some socks that I left, and they asked me to come back home. I've decided to stay and just be sort of comfortable before I go to boot camp, no matter how much I feel like a burden. I'm about to go to sleep, I've got work in the morning. This is probably my last entry. Goodnight.
It's 10:00 at night right now. It's been 13 hours since waking up and making the influenced decision to move out of Audra & Matt's house. I'm at the Living Word Bible Church, or "Boob church" as the locals like to call it. My plan is to sleep here for the next week or two, until my parents come, which is hopefully soon. Since I'm able to do my community service here, I'm pretty sure it's a great idea to squat here. If i go to sleep when the church closes and I'll get enough sleep to wake up when they close again. I can then work from that time until it closes once again, and get a good 14-16 hour work day. They also feed me a sandwich sometime during the day, and I have three granola bars left, so food is taken care of. I have somewhere to sleep, spend my time, and my community service should be done by Sunday or so. I have a trash bag full of clothes and my possessions include a deodorant, shoes, some items of meaning which are A day of silence card, a picture taken at prom of Haley, Connor, Christine, and myself, a book of matches, a lighter and my ipod, and 2 dollars to my name. Possession wise I have little, if nothing. But somehow I'm okay with what I'm doing and the decision I've made. I'm preparing for the lifestyle that I will undoubtedly have. This is a random thought, but when I close my eyes all I can hear is life around me. The ceaseless chirp of crickets, the wind rustling the leaves of trees, and I can feel the brightness of the moon upon my face. When I close my eyes I see dots play across my eyelids as if in some crazy dance. I should get going. So long; David Allen Lindsey.
Vagrancy Day Two:I was stopped by the police today. When I woke up, I had gone over to a wall to sit on and smoke a cigarette. After I had finished it, a cop pulls up and flashes his lights. I hopped down and he said someone called in because they thought I was smoking pot. So we start this 10 minute tirade of him accusing me of smoking weed whilst going through my meager possessions. After his search was in vain, he asks me when I was doing out here, If i had a home to go to, etc. I tell him I do and that I had walked here to do community service which then gets him to go to his computer to look up my crime. I had lied about my age so he didn't write me a ticket for smoking underage, so he couldn't find any record of me in the system, and after awhile of him asking my birthday over and over again, and talking shit about how I look like I slept outside and whatnot, I just asked if I could be on my way, since I wasn't smoking pot and that's what he came there for anyway. He sighed and told me to stop smoking and sped away in his cruiser. So I guess that was the scary event of today, and it's made me decide to sleep in a park today, so the church doesn't find out about me living on their property. My feet are hurting immensely right now because I didn't have socks and blood blisters had formed in every part of my shoe where skin touches crease and nook. I worked 16 hours today; I've cleaned bathrooms, vacuumed, swept, picked up numerous pieces of trash all while hearing people talk about their prejudiced beliefs. Instead of a sandwich, they fed me some pasta today which was pretty filling and I was grateful for it. Meh, I dunno... I like this lifestyle, I'm as independent as I've always wanted to be (Don't get me wrong though, my parents have always been very lenient.), but not being able to shower is really taking its toll. I REALLY want a shower right now. I got a lot of slivers in my back and arms when I slept last night from the wood floor. Sigh, I'm okay I just need more sleep and less work hours haha. Ive gotta go and try to sleep. Goodnight.
Vagrancy Day Three:
I went home today to get some socks that I left, and they asked me to come back home. I've decided to stay and just be sort of comfortable before I go to boot camp, no matter how much I feel like a burden. I'm about to go to sleep, I've got work in the morning. This is probably my last entry. Goodnight.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Strangers
So yesterday I went to the church for community service, and I had been awake for 34 hours by the time I was done. On my way home, I decided to go to Kristina's house to see if I could borrow her guitar for a couple weeks, but she wasn't there and when I jumped the fence to get to her apartments by tire deflated. (It doesn't have a hole or anything, I think the pressure was just taken out when the bike hit the ground.)
So 8 hours of work, 34 hours without sleep, and a flat tire which I have to walk home 2 miles. On my walk home, I was just listening to music when I saw a car suddenly get a flat ahead of me. They pulled into a parking lot, and I ran over there because 2 of my things on my list of 100 are to change a tire and help a complete stranger out.
When I got there, I introduced myself and asked him if I could help him change his tire. He lets me and as we change the tire we start talking. I tell him I'm joining the Air Force in a couple of weeks and he tells me that he's a vet and was in the Air Force, Navy, and Army. He fought in the Korean War, Vietnam War, and Desert Storm. We talk for awhile about all of this and he gives me advice on how to go through the military. After the tire was changed I thanked him and told him about my list of 100 things I wanted to do this summer which explained why I was there helping him in the first place. He pulled out a 20 dollar bill, and tried to hand it to me, which I refused and told him all I wanted was to shake his hand. He was adamant and said "Either I throw this on the ground, or you take it for helping an old man remember his life." I relented and shook his hand and asked him if there was anything at all I could do for him. He told me that while I'm in the military, to write him. So he gave me his address and I told him I would try to write him :).
So from a shitty sleep-deprived day to an exchange of stories between two strangers. I can't wait to write this man while I'm in. He inspires me and I hope that someday I could help him in someway.
-David
So 8 hours of work, 34 hours without sleep, and a flat tire which I have to walk home 2 miles. On my walk home, I was just listening to music when I saw a car suddenly get a flat ahead of me. They pulled into a parking lot, and I ran over there because 2 of my things on my list of 100 are to change a tire and help a complete stranger out.
When I got there, I introduced myself and asked him if I could help him change his tire. He lets me and as we change the tire we start talking. I tell him I'm joining the Air Force in a couple of weeks and he tells me that he's a vet and was in the Air Force, Navy, and Army. He fought in the Korean War, Vietnam War, and Desert Storm. We talk for awhile about all of this and he gives me advice on how to go through the military. After the tire was changed I thanked him and told him about my list of 100 things I wanted to do this summer which explained why I was there helping him in the first place. He pulled out a 20 dollar bill, and tried to hand it to me, which I refused and told him all I wanted was to shake his hand. He was adamant and said "Either I throw this on the ground, or you take it for helping an old man remember his life." I relented and shook his hand and asked him if there was anything at all I could do for him. He told me that while I'm in the military, to write him. So he gave me his address and I told him I would try to write him :).
So from a shitty sleep-deprived day to an exchange of stories between two strangers. I can't wait to write this man while I'm in. He inspires me and I hope that someday I could help him in someway.
-David
Thursday, June 18, 2009
As of today
I'm $210 closer to leaving. I should be done in about 8 days from now. :)
I'll miss my childhood and everyone who was in it.
I'll miss my childhood and everyone who was in it.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Pre-Dawn Wonderment
Time and time again, I feel as if I'm looking at myself and my actions from a 3rd person point-of-view. Previously I only felt this way when I was ashamed, embarassed, or angry. Now I'm beginning to feel as though this person inside of me, this soul that is buried so deep within my conscious is beginning to bloom and shape the person I feel destined to become. I begin to see life in a new hue of vibrant color, a blossoming of chance and opportunity. When I act, I'm beginning to see patterns of where those actions will take me in my future. I'm no saint, I'm no saviour, but I feel that I can influence and inspire the people around me to do better. Better for themselves, better for their family, or better in any way they choose to see the situation. I always ask myself "What's good?" As in all situations, there is no black and white in this world. So no, I will not judge what actions my own personal sphere of gravitation my fellow man is drawn towards make. If I inspire some to change the habits they feel is bad, or if I inspire some to change to do something you or I would feel is wrong I see it the same way anyone would: I take solace in the fact that they simply changed. I can't control someones' life, nor do I have the desire to. I just want to go through my life helping people make the decision to make a better way through this epic journey for themselves, in any way they see fit.
As dawn approaches, I will take a moment to wonder where my life is headed. Who am I going to meet? Who am I going to love? Who am I going to be?
I'm not sure if any of this made sense, but I just needed to transcribe my feelings once again. If you have any advice for me, leave a comment
Always yours,
David
As dawn approaches, I will take a moment to wonder where my life is headed. Who am I going to meet? Who am I going to love? Who am I going to be?
I'm not sure if any of this made sense, but I just needed to transcribe my feelings once again. If you have any advice for me, leave a comment
Always yours,
David
Friday, June 5, 2009
My list of 100 things to do this summer
1. Learn to ride my motorcycle
2. Go on a motorcycle ride w/ Weston
3. Go Salt River Tubing
4. Smoke Hookah
5. Run from the apartment to Tempe Town Lake
6. Go on my bike ride around the Beeline Highway
7. Bike to South Mountain and up it.
8. Go to a beach in California (Done)
9. Read 10 books
10. Volunteer (Done)
11. Quit Smoking (Update: Cravings are going down :))
12. Go to Sun Splash
13. Take Annie for a walk (Done)
14. Hang out w/ Robert before he leaves (Done)
15. Hang out w/ Weston before he leaves (Done)
16. Finish those 5 Philosophy Books
17. Go to Bookmans' (Done)
18. Ride the Light-rail, get off at every stop to explore the area
19. Go to Phoenix (Done)
20. Go down Van Buren st.
21. Find any Community Activities to Participate in (Done)
22. Get a "Fuck you, you fucking fuckers" T-Shirt.
23. Graduate (Done)
24. Have a 3.2 GPA for my Senior Year (Done)
25. Help out 7 different strangers
26. Host a party (Done)
27. Find something cool; a knick knack or something
28. Draw something (Done)
29. Buy Sidewalk Chalk
30. Use Sidewalk Chalk
31. Go Swimming (Done)
32. Go Fishing
33. Get a Job (Done)
34. Get a haircut
35. Get a Non-Serious Girlfriend
36. See Robert's Baby
37. Go to Mexico
38. Say goodbye to my friends and family (Done)
39. Take a summer class
40. Learn how to play the guitar better (Done)
41. Play the drums in matts' band.
42. Go to Las Vegas.
43. Go to the Grand Canyon
44. Go to the Canyon near Page
45. Stargaze
46. Leave a secret in a Post-Secret Book.
47. Flip off a Police Officer
48. Drink a 40 oz. in 40 minutes (Done)
49. Play Edward 40-Hands
50. Have a serious conversation with Christine before I leave (Done)
51. Go to the Zoo
52. See Frank in California (Done)
53. Sabotage somebody's plans
54. Win 3 times in a row at Beer-Pong
55. Lose 10 pounds
56. Try Yoga
57. Pick a direction to start walking and see how far I can go
58. Buy a camera
59. Use a camera(Done)
60. Delete my Myspace (Done)
61. Delete my AIM Buddy-List(Done)
62. Pay off my ticket ($350 less as of 6/21.)
63. Ride my Motorcycle to California
64. Fix my Motorcycle
65. Buy a Journal(Done)
66. Attempt Rock-Climbing (Done)
67. Write some prose (Done)
68. Find a preferred writing style (Done)
69. Fix the Computers in Storage
70. Sell the Computers in Storage
71. Laugh hysterically (Done)
72. Meet somebody new (Done)
73. Talk to Frank about enrolling in college(Done)
74. Plan a Budget for Traveling (Done)
75. Play a pick-up game of Basketball
76. Play a game of Football
77. Write a poem(Done)
78. Create an original short story
79. Ride on a boat
80. Get Drunk (Done)
81. See fireworks
82. Set off fireworks
83. Kiss a girl (Done)
84. Make as few promises about future communication as possible (Done)
85. Go on an adventure (Done)
86. Go hiking (Done)
87. Help someone change a tire. (Done)
88. Give advice to someone who needs it (Done)
89. Ask Matt and Audra if we can Couch-Host (Done)
90. Fast for a day
91. Solve an urgent problem (Done)
92. Spot an animal in the Desert (Done)
93. Run a 7 minute or faster mile
94. Learn a new skill (Done)
95. Get Christine's Mailing Address(Done)
96. Get the Phone-numbers of 3 high-school friends(Done)
97. Look at College prospects(Done)
98. Go to a college party
99. Encourage Matt & Audra to eat healthier(Done)
100. Feel Free
And there you have it. My list of 100 things to do this summer.
2. Go on a motorcycle ride w/ Weston
3. Go Salt River Tubing
4. Smoke Hookah
5. Run from the apartment to Tempe Town Lake
6. Go on my bike ride around the Beeline Highway
7. Bike to South Mountain and up it.
8. Go to a beach in California (Done)
9. Read 10 books
10. Volunteer (Done)
11. Quit Smoking (Update: Cravings are going down :))
12. Go to Sun Splash
13. Take Annie for a walk (Done)
14. Hang out w/ Robert before he leaves (Done)
15. Hang out w/ Weston before he leaves (Done)
16. Finish those 5 Philosophy Books
17. Go to Bookmans' (Done)
18. Ride the Light-rail, get off at every stop to explore the area
19. Go to Phoenix (Done)
20. Go down Van Buren st.
21. Find any Community Activities to Participate in (Done)
22. Get a "Fuck you, you fucking fuckers" T-Shirt.
23. Graduate (Done)
24. Have a 3.2 GPA for my Senior Year (Done)
25. Help out 7 different strangers
26. Host a party (Done)
27. Find something cool; a knick knack or something
28. Draw something (Done)
29. Buy Sidewalk Chalk
30. Use Sidewalk Chalk
31. Go Swimming (Done)
32. Go Fishing
33. Get a Job (Done)
34. Get a haircut
35. Get a Non-Serious Girlfriend
36. See Robert's Baby
37. Go to Mexico
38. Say goodbye to my friends and family (Done)
39. Take a summer class
40. Learn how to play the guitar better (Done)
41. Play the drums in matts' band.
42. Go to Las Vegas.
43. Go to the Grand Canyon
44. Go to the Canyon near Page
45. Stargaze
46. Leave a secret in a Post-Secret Book.
47. Flip off a Police Officer
48. Drink a 40 oz. in 40 minutes (Done)
49. Play Edward 40-Hands
50. Have a serious conversation with Christine before I leave (Done)
51. Go to the Zoo
52. See Frank in California (Done)
53. Sabotage somebody's plans
54. Win 3 times in a row at Beer-Pong
55. Lose 10 pounds
56. Try Yoga
57. Pick a direction to start walking and see how far I can go
58. Buy a camera
59. Use a camera(Done)
60. Delete my Myspace (Done)
61. Delete my AIM Buddy-List(Done)
62. Pay off my ticket ($350 less as of 6/21.)
63. Ride my Motorcycle to California
64. Fix my Motorcycle
65. Buy a Journal(Done)
66. Attempt Rock-Climbing (Done)
67. Write some prose (Done)
68. Find a preferred writing style (Done)
69. Fix the Computers in Storage
70. Sell the Computers in Storage
71. Laugh hysterically (Done)
72. Meet somebody new (Done)
73. Talk to Frank about enrolling in college(Done)
74. Plan a Budget for Traveling (Done)
75. Play a pick-up game of Basketball
76. Play a game of Football
77. Write a poem(Done)
78. Create an original short story
79. Ride on a boat
80. Get Drunk (Done)
81. See fireworks
82. Set off fireworks
83. Kiss a girl (Done)
84. Make as few promises about future communication as possible (Done)
85. Go on an adventure (Done)
86. Go hiking (Done)
87. Help someone change a tire. (Done)
88. Give advice to someone who needs it (Done)
89. Ask Matt and Audra if we can Couch-Host (Done)
90. Fast for a day
91. Solve an urgent problem (Done)
92. Spot an animal in the Desert (Done)
93. Run a 7 minute or faster mile
94. Learn a new skill (Done)
95. Get Christine's Mailing Address(Done)
96. Get the Phone-numbers of 3 high-school friends(Done)
97. Look at College prospects(Done)
98. Go to a college party
99. Encourage Matt & Audra to eat healthier(Done)
100. Feel Free
And there you have it. My list of 100 things to do this summer.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
I felt something new today.
Today, I felt like an adult for the first time in my life. It hit me that I'm done with highschool, the first part of my life, and i'm beginning to make decisions that are vital to my future by myself (although I admit I had help from a friend). I was going for a run, and when I was out there, I kept seeing people my age, and whatnot. But it feels as if I'm not a kid anymore. I don't have someone looking out for me, I don't have someone who always has my back. I'm my own person as of today. I'm beginning to think of my future more often, and of how much of an impact decisions now have on the outcome of my life.
I'm starting to figure that 20 years from now, i'll be more upset with shit I didn't do, than being 'secure' with second hand decisions made. I don't know what to do with myself, but I know that tomorrow I'm going to sign up for my volunteering, and hope I land a good cause.
I still haven't gotten around to putting up my list of 100 things I want to do this summer, but i'll try to post it later tonight.
I'm starting to figure that 20 years from now, i'll be more upset with shit I didn't do, than being 'secure' with second hand decisions made. I don't know what to do with myself, but I know that tomorrow I'm going to sign up for my volunteering, and hope I land a good cause.
I still haven't gotten around to putting up my list of 100 things I want to do this summer, but i'll try to post it later tonight.
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Summer Time
So, I'm pretty sure this is the best summer I have ever had. And it's only about 2 weeks in. Let me walk you through my summer thus far:
Thursday, May 21st: I graduated from highschool, My parents and brother, whom live out of state came to the ceremony, I saw my friend Robert who had not been at school the last month.
Friday: Hung out with Frank and my parents. Went bowling. That night I went to a house party with my friend Weston, and it was alright, sort of lame but meh; it had beer, people(too many), and music. We hung out there for like an hour or two, just drinking and smoking. We decide to leave, and head to Tempe. We drove around looking for parking, found a spot and decided to walk up a mountain that was decorated by the local college. We walked all the way up, and it was just.. inspiring. We just sat and talked about life and growing up and whatnot. We decide then to go around the back side of the mountain (we jumped a fence), and we sat on this little cliff face with our feet dangling off the sides for a good 15 minutes. After this moment we decide to live a little and ended up doing something that probaly could've gotten us jail time. I would love to detail it, but... I breathed in the essence of the human's rebellious spirit.
Saturday: Hung around the house, rested, played Fable II with my dad all day. At around like... midnight I get a call from Taylor, and I spend the next hour trying to get a hold of her, until I finally do at about 1:00. She invited me to a party she was throwing, so I finally got my brother to take me, and at about 2:30 we got there. We played beer pong (one game which me and my friend christine lost). I Drank some peach schnapps, about another 3-4 beers, danced to some music, got an awesome back massage, talked about life and living until about 7:30 in the morning, and then slept til about noon on sunday. Went home, couldn't sleep anymore so I just hung around the house.
Fast forward to.... Thursday: Me and Christine hung out, I showed her my little slice of heaven, we went to an arts and crafts store, had some nice smoothies which she paid for (awesome coz i'm poor as shit), then I went home.
Friday: Went to Weston's Going-Away/Graduation Party. We had Hot Dogs, swam in a pool, and just relaxed as we thought about how our highschool lives were done and over with.
Saturday: Hung around with Matt and Audra, until around 11:50, Weston picked me up to take me to his house , so we could leave in the morning for California. At like 2:00 i couldn't sleep so I called a friend, then talked to her until like 3. (I attempted to solidify feelings that seemed mutual between the two of us, but alas, our lives are moving in two different directions at this moment in time.)
Sunday: Drove to California, made it there at 1:00, and we spend about 2 1/2 hours trying to find Venice Beach. We finally did, and we just hung around watching the waves, riding bikes on the beach walkway which was nice and relaxing, watched a few pick up basketball games and there was a weed laws reform group on the beach playing music and just hanging around. It was nice to just relax and feel the beat of the drums vibrate through my skin into the veins and up into my heart. We walked on the pier, and watched people fish and what have you. We saw a seal which was neat.
Monday: Today me and Weston went to Magic Mountain. It was a whirlwind of thirst, losing my voice, screaming, talking to mutual strangers (BTW, every woman in California is fucking fine, And my self esteem went up as more than a few flirted with me.). We went on just about every ride, and had a hell of a time. After this we left for the hotel. When we got to the hotel, we called Frank and asked him to come see us and we just hung out and laughed about our future plans. I'm going to miss the hell out of him. And Weston, too.
Tuesday: Today we drove down to Oceanside (Where Frank is), and stayed on the beach for awhile, swimming and basking in the sunshine for a few hours until Frank was off of work, then we were with him for about an hour until we had to leave back to Arizona. The drive home was nice, but mostly uneventful. We were pulled over and I had the chance to giggle at the pawn in this game of chess the government plays so well.
So, all of memories aren't exactly the reason why it's going to be the best summer i've had so far but it's a mixture of them and my plans for this last summer of my youth that makes it. I have a list of 100 things I want to complete before I leave (I may post it later), My prospects of love have been higher than they ever have with the girl i'm enamoured with, I'm confident with where my life is headed, and I'm ready to become this ideal of a man i've had hatching in my brain for the past 17 years.
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